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Re: UK Producers Seek Comedy Screenplays


Here's a romantic comedy that's a twist on a beloved sci-fi subgenre:

Stand Tall! (romantic comedy, 102 pages)
Vincent J. Paterno

LOGLINE:
A Vegas waitress tripled in size falls for the scientist who accidentally enlarged her, sacrificing stature and stardom to save him when he’s kidnapped.

SYNOPSIS:
Colleen Cossitt, a pert blonde singing-dancing waitress at the rundown Bryson casino on the Las Vegas Strip, sees old high school flame Bill Messmer, a basketball star turned engineering executive, and accepts his offer for a date. She learns she needs money for ailing 8-year-old nephew Ivan Black’s medical bills and hopes that if she and Bill click, he’ll pay them. She auditions to moonlight at the nearby Purple Pavilion exotic club, but its smarmy owner Vito Cortez, unimpressed with her figure, tells Colleen to “get bigger.”

Scientist Keswick Fletcher, a longtime customer of hers who secretly owes Vito $154,000 for a gambling debt, says he’s created a device called the Resizer that isolates and enlarges body parts, and offers to enhance her breasts for free. She accepts and travels with Meg Switlik, her best friend and Vito’s girlfriend, to Keswick’s lab, a converted trucking warehouse north of town. As the procedure begins, a minor earthquake throws everything off -- instead of tripling the volume of Colleen’s breasts, her entire body grows three times larger, to 16-foot-1⅛. As the Resizer can only enlarge objects, not reduce them, she’s stuck at that size, and Keswick fears her condition could be fatal. Colleen, in hiding, asks Meg to tell Bill their date that night is off.

Meg, who left her wallet at the lab, brings Bill there after he pays for her gas. But when Colleen, unaware he’s with her, lifts the garage door, Bill sees she’s now a giant and wants nothing to do with her. Devastated, Colleen gets additional support as struggling older sister Maureen Cossitt, an ex-addict, and her son Ivan (who, to his aunt’s relief, loves that she’s become “fee-fi-fo-fum” size) move in, and her clothes are brought in and enlarged. Before discovering her “little sister” has tripled in scale, Maureen reveals Colleen’s secret to Keswick -- her ex, Tim Whitman, so severely beat her she is unable to bear children.

Keswick and aide Belinda Austin unsuccessfully try to restore her over the next few weeks, and as time goes by it becomes apparent her gigantism won't kill her. When he and Colleen are alone one evening, they discover they’ve fallen in love. She affectionately calls him “my little Keswick,” and each promises to protect the other, although she isn’t aware he knows her secret and thus understands why she (affectionately) treats him as a surrogate child.

The casino’s eccentric owner, Ernest Sanderson (who Vito is blackmailing on behalf of the Boston mob), wants to fire Colleen for a prolonged leave of absence. He finally finds her in the lab, and she pressures him into paying Ivan’s medical expenses. He signs her to a $1 million deal to headline at his showroom, with Keswick hired as manager to assure she isn’t exploited.

After a clumsy, aborted debut for which she publicly apologizes, Colleen becomes a hit attraction performing ’60s girl-group songs, a happy giant beloved by young and old in Sin City, even performing family weekend matinees. She repels a romantic challenge from Keswick’s vacuous socialite ex-girlfriend Cassandra Maitland, and drives money-mad Tim out of her life, adding she won’t lose her “giant virginity” to him. Moreover, Ernest has fallen for Maureen. Life is good.

But Colleen fires Keswick when he’s seen with rival casino star Cynthia Seaton (he rejects a multi-million offer to make her a giant), then ends their romance when she learns he owes a six-figure gambling sum. After Keswick refuses Vito’s offer to use her show as collateral, not letting on he’s no longer her manager, he’s kidnapped by Vito’s henchmen. Keswick is absent for several days, and Maureen reminds her sister he truly loves her. A lonely Colleen regrets letting him go and cries in her dressing room.

Meg finds Keswick at Vito’s hideaway and learns of her boss's mob ties, then tells Colleen where he’s held. She vows to rescue him, but is told she’s currently too big to do so without potentially endangering him. Belinda, who’s altered the Resizer, restores Colleen to her old 5-foot-4⅜ stature. They join Maureen and Meg in rescuing him.

Vito’s gang pursues them, but when they reach the lab, Colleen (who learns to her dismay the new Resizer can’t re-enlarge her) entangles them in her giant lingerie. Vito escapes and enters the lab with a gun, but Colleen pushes him into the Resizer chamber when he runs out of bullets and Ivan reduces him to one-third scale. A frightened, tiny Vito agrees to waive Keswick’s debts after he’s hidden from sight.

Colleen decides to retire, accepting Keswick’s marriage proposal in return for his quitting gambling. She closes her farewell show with a love song to Keswick, just as the shrinking effect wears off and she bursts out of her gown back to triple size. (Vito also grows back, but is trapped inside a crib at the lab.) She tells Keswick if he doesn’t want to marry her now, she’ll understand, but he tells her he’ll keep his promise. “There’s no other man I’d rather lose my giant virginity to,” she privately says to him, then proudly announces her return to performing and their engagement to a delighted, sold-out crowd.
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Re: UK Producers Seek Comedy Screenplays


Hello,

Three comedy loglines for your consideration.

Please message/email me and provide your IMDB link or website for synopses.

LOVE STUPID
In the vein of “50 First Dates”, “There’s Something about Mary”.

Logline: A serial-relationship-killer gives up on romance just as the perfect woman falls into his life. Can he overcome his self-sabotaging ways and finally find happiness ... or is he forever damned to "love stupid"?

BINGO BANGO

BINGO BANGO is a wacky ensemble comedy in the vein of THE WEDDING SINGER.

Logline: A nebbish BINGO caller has a change of fortune when he inherits a BINGO marker from the luckiest old lady in town. Is it the BINGO marker or him that's making his luck?

AWKWARD

In the vein of "There's Something About Mary" meets "Defending My Life"

Logline: A toxic salesman is reincarnated as a social misfit to learn life lessons about humility and love.

About me:

I am an award-winning filmmaker, screenwriter and published graphic novelist.

[sign in to see URL]
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Re: UK Producers Seek Comedy Screenplays


Four ordinary city guys find themselves where we've all been - at that critical moment in your life when you have to get your love life together and have to decide "Do you hang in there and tackle your love issues or throw in the towel?
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Re: UK Producers Seek Comedy Screenplays


 

I'm itzhak begerano
Script writer from Israel, College graduate in cinema and TV. Studies-directing and script writing
I'm not a producer
Email: kim01@[sign in to see URL]

offering2 scripts

[sign in to see URL] 2020 project

Feature script - 144 pages
Tv series script:-320 pages
Phantasmagoria 2020 also fits for :
animation/live action/cartoons/comics/graphic novel/ web series/Feature film/ TV series
style:Catch-22 ,M*A*S*H* ,Red Alert ,The Good Soldier Švejk
Genre: fiction-comedy (satire(
1 .on 2016-won contest(ioff(
[sign in to see URL] 2017phantasmagoria 2020 logline is the LOGLINE OF THE DAY on the ANIMATION Festival site and is one of the best to read for 2017.

Log line:
 Mad politicians and a hallucinated war! A confrontation between democrats versus Islamic in 2020 ... may lead the world to final destruction

Synopsis:
On 2020, the most famous and evil terrorist of all times-Mike Satanic, Caesar of Terror, managed to escape from the democratic prison in the desert and joined the Islamic forces .Suleiman Aswad the Islam's president announced that he would not give Mike Satanic back to Monro the democrat's president .This action led to war between the democrat's and the Islam's in the Fata Morgana Desert and when the battle eventually began, neither side showed the other any mercy. While the two armies fought, Hollywood superstar and entertainer, Barney Chaplin, was entertaining the democratic soldiers who were stationed in the desert. One night, he and his companion officers lost their way in the desert and were captured by the Islamic commando. Aswad developed an evil plan whereby the captives’ fate depended on Barney’s ability to entertain everyone during his time in prison or they will die!Meantime,Monro forced to send a strange and lunatic commando force from holywwod to the Islamic desert in an attempt to free the democrat prisoners before their execution while the 2 presidents led the planet into World War 3

phantasmagoria2020-mad politic-short animation(trailer(
[sign in to see URL]
-mad politic-short animation(trailer(
this short animation (based partly on the last sceene) : this will give you some perspective and knowledge about my project direction.
Project Phantasmagoria 2020 also fit for :
Worldwide Media formats
Animation for: film/TV series, [sign in to see URL] live action script -style “Lord of the rings”, 3. TV script (live action) 4. Comics, [sign in to see URL]. 6. Graphic Novel.7. Web series, 8. An possibility for reality show (where anyone can play and participate -for television, web
WGA west: 1698259
.Short animation synopsis(trailer(
The democrat government members staying in mental institution called "the white mouse". Meantime, their doubles appear in surprise. Their psychiatrist "Professor cheers" taking care of the drugged politicians, make them feel like in heaven with helping of Hookahs that make them high.

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Re: UK Producers Seek Comedy Screenplays


Hi,

I'm an award winning and produced writer with a completed TV MOW romantic fantasy script. The ending is so sweet it may give viewers diabetes, but the ladies who have read it think it's grand - This amuses me as I am a chauvinistic swine.

Between Here And There, "A woman trapped in an unhappy marriage finds Mr Right and the courage to change her life while in a coma."

First pages and brief synopsis posted here: [sign in to see URL]

Thank you for your consideration.

John

Last edited by x32792, 7/26/2017, 9:43 pm


---
In 6 short years, I earned a 4 year degree from a large brick and mortar university.
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Re: UK Producers Seek Comedy Screenplays


Hi. I've got a musical comedy for film script titled No Matter What Forever. Sort of like something Python or Blake Edwards morphed with video scenes like in A Hard Day's Night. A multi-ethnic cast.

Log line: An ex-singer cleans up to join a comeback band and becomes involved with a priest, a newswoman and police tracking a woman known as "the nymphomaniac serial killer."

The title song demo is on YouTube. My other tunes there are not from the project. Script done but may get a rewrite. Still finishing the movie songs.

Looking to keep ownership of the music and be involved in any sequels, spin-offs, etc. Back end pay if the thing hits. For sale or option.

Thanks, good luck with your picks. And make films I'm going to want to watch endlessly please.



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Re: UK Producers Seek Comedy Screenplays


For your consideration:

Screenplay – Drama/Comedy
Title: Muddy Munday “Forward from a troubled past.”

Best Feature Film Script, 2017 European Independent Film Award

Inspired by a true story, set in current day Ireland.

Logline: “A Jamaican born, British football legend and his stubborn Irish sidekick, battle their own turbulent pasts, as they cautiously enter a mixed group of Protestant and Catholic orphans into the Northern Ireland Games.”

Synopsis: Our protagonists are business partners from disparate backgrounds. Retired European football star Marvin “Luther” Garvey and his cantankerous, Irish-Catholic friend, Padraic O’Kane, live comfortably while the struggles of the past shape and haunt their everyday existence. A wealthy Luther fights past and present day racism on the football pitch by lecturing throughout Europe. Paddy remains indignant about the treatment of Catholics in Ireland, especially the Bloody Sunday which ended the life of his young brother some forty-four years earlier.
 
Through a series of reality lessons, they both begin a healing process on different paths. Paddy’s initial transformation begins for all the wrong reasons. Eventually, he begins to accept those non-catholic citizens outside the comfort and security of his "RealSport” Pub, "St. Aidens" church and the "Gingernut” Barbershop. Luther’s epiphany comes about as the result of a chance meeting with an orphan boy named Manus Marley and his band of parentless footballers who hail from both sides of the sectarian tracks. Luther attempts to enter the young adults into the Northern Ireland Games known locally as “THE NIG.” Many people in both communities quietly condemn the multifarious squad, but a few protest violently.

Football teams from around the globe, such as “Pint Size Paris”, “Sisilly Boys” and the “Alabama Freedom Riders” from the U.S., are registered for the storied competition. An uncooperative committee finally allows Luther and the orphans to test their skills in the tournament. The “Kid United” team from England and the mixed green, ragamuffin “ProCats” face-off in the final match. In the end, the post-game actions of a few key players and “a wee bit a mud”, serve to unify everyone involved, especially on the issues of gender, class, race, religion and social indifference.

Final thought; “Selma meets Ned Divine wrapped in an Oliver Twist”

Thank you for your precious time, jcoach4134@[sign in to see URL]
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Re: UK Producers Seek Comedy Screenplays


I have a low budget comedy which would probably work. Email me ([sign in to see URL]@[sign in to see URL]) Thks.
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Re: UK Producers Seek Comedy Screenplays


Hi. Please find the loglines for two ultra low budget scripts below. My last script was also an ultra low budget and was produced this year, about to go into global distribution. Both of the scripts below can be shot for under $250,000. All of “Lock Down” occurs in one room, though there are more than 2 actors. “The Mitigation Gene” originally occurred in only one room, but a few outside scenes were added. The first scene can be done with blue screen and/or inexpensive CGI without too much expense.

Thanks.

(Ultra Low Budget Political Thriller) “The Mitigation Gene,” On the eve of a Jihadist Armageddon, a brilliant scientist, a religious leader, and the American President meet in a bunker a mile underground to try to save the human race.
 
(Ultra Low Budget Horror) “Lock Down,” When an earthquake disables the security system in an asylum for the criminally insane, a nurse locks herself in a safe room… together with the craziest psychopath of them all.
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Re: UK Producers Seek Comedy Screenplays


A FUNNY THING HAPPENED AT THE BANK.

The bank robbers George, Bob, Cyril and Frank attempt to rob the bank. But the takings van has been and gone from the bank with the takings. So they decide to take a hostage, Harry. After a getaway chase and pretend fight with the police. The bank robbers take Harry home.

The police, Sgt Harder and co. Are convinced Harry is one of the bank robbers. As the bank robbers turn up at their flat with Harry. The next door neighbour wants to know why they have a man with a hood over his head. Bob tells her Harry is in disguise. And at that they go into the flat. Inside the flat Harry meets Julianna. She is George's sister. She does fetish work for high court judges, disciplining them. She leaves to go to work. After Julianna has left. The bank robbers tie Harry up with a hood over his head. The bank robbers then go off to do another small job. The next door neighbour on hearing funny noises from next door phones the police and informs them something strange is going on next door. The police turn up at the bank robbers flat, break in. They find Harry hooded and tied up, very strange. They don't believe his story that he's innocent. Accused of being a part of the bank robbers gang Harry is carted off to jail.

The bank robbers return to to their flat only to find Harry gone and the front door left open. The next door neighbour is standing on her step waiting for them. She tells them the police came and took Harry away. The bank robbers, or rather George. Decide to to get Harry back.

The bank robbers next morning then re-rescue Harry from the police cells disguised as police with beards. Harry is completely unaware who they are. The bank robbers take Harry home but on the way they decide to just stop in at the same church Julianna goes to.

The real police, after realising Harry has been taken. Then turn up at the bank robbers flat looking for Harry. Julianna tells them to mind their own business. The police tell her they'll be back. They are then told by the next door neighbour, she was listening in. To go to the local church. She tells them that's where Harry might be. Meanwhile the bank robbers dressed as police, have left the church and are going back their flat. But before they did, they have a little conversation with Father Anthony, the priest of the church. The bank robbers then leave the church.

Half an hour later the real police turn up. This confuses Father Anthony. He tells them they were in the church half an hour ago. They insist they weren't. The real police realise what's happened and go to the bank robbers flat, again. The bank robbers by this time are back at the flat and have changed into their normal clothes.

The police turn up with a screech of the tires. The bank robbers look out the window and see the police. They then dress up as older women and escape out the back way. They all manage to get away in the car. Julianna and Harry decide to give themselves up to Sgt Harder and they insist on seeing Sgt Harder's chief superintendent at the police station.

The main bank robber, George, finally gives himself up. Julianna helps him get a lighter sentence because she does the fetish work for a particular judge. The reason the police are told go to the church is because Julianna attends church quite a lot. The next door neighbour knows this and also Julianna is George's sister. So she puts 2 + 2 together.

There's a lot more. There's a scene where Julianna has a talk with Father Anthony about the fetish work she does for the Judge. And Father Anthony tells Julianna, it's alright the church has been advocating self flagellation for centuries.
 
Sgt Flaherty, the desk Sgt. And his rivalry with Sgt Harder. Sgt Harder also has to be constantly reprimanded by his station chief superintendent, Moullier, that Harry is not one of the bank robbers.

There's a scene in the police interview room where Sgt Harder tells Harry that from the evidence he has put together. He has worked out that Harry was a lookout for the bank robbers because he didn't lie down on the bank floor quick enough when the bank robbers first entered the bank. This was because Harry was completely oblivious to the bank robbers when they first entered the bank. He was waiting in line for his money from the teller.

Sgt Harder has been in the force 20 years and knows a thing or two about bank robberies. And he knows a bank robber when he sees one. And according to Sgt Harder Harry looks like a bank robber, that's enough evidence for Sgt Harder.
 
I have been told it's a really good script. As to whether it gets produced or not, I don't know. Harry is from Belgravia, the bank robbers are from the east end. The police are PC plod and co. Very London based. Easy local locations. Wardrobe not difficult.

It's a script based comedy. It's been likened to the 'carry on's' in its style of writing. That's just my style of writing. upursareswipe@[sign in to see URL]. If you're looking for a Notting Hill this is not one of those type of comedies.

Last edited by crazywritersInc, 10/18/2017, 7:06 pm
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